I was looking through your xanga (what? I miss you!) and I noticed you used the phrase "pre-disastered."
My dad loves that phrase. He thinks it's a brilliant idea: a plane flies into your house and you lose everything, and that's the best thing ever! you're pre-disastered! That's why I don't want to own a lot of stuff. When you own stuff you're tied down by heavy atoms, and for what? Half the shit I own doesn't really /do/ anything except take up space. But that's it's purpose! We have so much space that it has to be taken up by space-consuming devices. ...that's RIDICULOUS! What do I even have two bed lamps on either side of my bed for? I only read on one side of my bed! And there's nothing in the draws of my nighttable, but if I took the nighttable away there'd be an empty spot where it's obvious something should be. I don't need half the books on my shelf, but without them, I'd have a few bare shelves!
But what if there's a fire and I have to evacuate? How do I know in that split second what I have to take and what I don't? That's the real evacuation plan: what do you keep? Your letters and my laptop. That's what I'd keep.
All this stuff could be money in the bank. The house, the land... millions upon millions, probably. This stuff is so old and valuable, and the land is so expensive now that it's 90210. But who cares if it's 90210? This is the same shitty piece of hill my parents bought when it was 90023. The only reason this place matters is because my parents built it themselves. And that's great, but I don't think it suits me. I want to keep a bunch of this lovely old stuff, but a lot of it can go. It'd be more valuable liquidized.
I guess what I'm saying is, I want to live pre-disastered with you. I hope you don't mind.
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The woman who taught me Russian today was this funny little woman with thick, thick glasses, and she never quite looked at your eyes when talking to you: she looked at your left ear, no matter who she was talking to. Never eye contact. She never seemed to get jokes or understand what people really meant to say. She read political cartoons from Russia to me. It's incredible how much hatred the US fosters.
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...I wikipedia'd Newark today just because it makes me feel closer to you. I love you.
--Nick
